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"My girlfriend will kill me over secret texts"

I’m very good friends with a fella at school. It’s an all boys school and I always text him when I’m home at weekends. He’s always there for me and he makes me laugh when I’m feeling down. If I don’t text him, or see him for a couple of weeks, I get annoyed and angry with other people. Why do I feel like this?

I love my girlfriend to bits and spend every minute with her but if she knew how much I text him she’d kill me cause she gets really jealous. Do you think I text him because he’s my only real friend and he’s someone different to talk to?

P.

Good friends talk regularly and when they can’t have a chat in person they text each other. Why has your girlfriend not met this fella from school? You say you love her but it doesn’t sound like you see her as a friend and it’s interesting that you say this lad is the ‘only real friend’ you have.

I’m guessing that you release your frustrations with people that annoy you by venting to your ‘real friend.’ When you talk or text him about your feelings your anger surfaces. When you’re not in contact with him you hold onto your negative feelings, which then build up in you. Then, when something happens that normally wouldn’t upset you, you explode.

Has it ever struck you that your girlfriend may be jealous because she thinks you’re texting other girls? Tell her the truth. If she loves you she’ll be happy that you have a genuine male friend.

My sister takes cocaine

My sister is a bit of a party animal and I’m worried about her. I know she does cocaine, even though she denies it. After what’s happened to people like Katy French, I think she’s stupid and selfish. She knows how I feel but says she’s sensible enough to be careful. I don’t want to snitch on her but I want her to stop. What should I do?

Sandra, 15

No drug abuser is capable of judging their own behaviour objectively. It’s hurtful when someone you love doesn’t care about how you feel, especially when you understand the serious consequences if she overdoses or gets contaminated powder and she ignores your concerns.

This is a serious life-challenging situation. Take action immediatley. It’s understandable that you’re reluctant to ‘snitch,’ so when you ask an adult to intervene think of it as a potentially life-saving action rather than ‘snitching.’ Even if your sister doesn’t appreciate it your actions demonstrate that you love her.

I want a tummy piercing

I want to pierce my belly button but my parents are dead against it. It’s so unfair because I’m old enough and a lot of my mates have had it done. How can I change their minds?

Niamh, 14

Sorry, but like your parents, I’m dead against any teenagers having their belly button pierced. This has nothing to do with your age; it’s because the potential health risks are serious.

When I was doing Relationship and Sexuality Education in schools I met so many teenage girls who developed infections as a result of piercings. One girl spent a couple of weeks in hospital with a serious internal infection that she’d contracted after getting her belly button pierced.

Several of her friends had their piercings done with no problems but she was the unlucky one who has to live with a scarred navel. I wouldn’t want that to happen to you. Like your parents, I care enough to want to protect you from a procedure that’s not safe.

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